alec_lightwood | Being kidnapped is not the best way to see the world (for his Magnus)

Alec woke to the sound of arguing and the feeling that his skull would split in two if he did anything more strenuous than breathing too deeply. Something that he doubted he could do judging by the way his chest ached with each inhalation, his body aching as if he'd been thoroughly beaten. Which, Alec realized was true. His memory was hazy but he remembered being attacked, outnumbered and separated from his siblings. He'd fought hard, but he'd been overwhelmed, taking a blow to the head that had caused the world to fade to a terrifying black.

But it seemed that someone had rescued him. Or more than one someone from the voices that argued nearby. Cracking open one eye, he immediately regretted the movement as the flat surface beneath him rocked, almost causing him to be ill. Then, he realized that the surface was moving in a way that meant that he had to be on a boat.

Getting control of his stomach, Alec opened both eyes this time to see that he was on a bed and near the foot three people argued. One had green skin. Another had blue. The other's complexion was a shade that mundanes would have considered normal, if darker than what was socially acceptable.

Their words washed over him but without true context, almost lulling him to sleep despite the harsh tones. Alec began to drift out of consciousness when someone mentioned throwing him off the boat. Since he assumed that they most likely weren't near land and even if they were, he was in no shape to swim to shore, that meant that one of them wanted to kill him. He began to sit up, biting his lip to silence sound that caught in his throat as his body protested the movement. "Killing me would be a bad idea."

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"Isn't it? Some times I think it breaks something in his brain just looking at it. After all, I bought it for that sole purpose. You should see the bright teal riding jacket I owned to go with it. I think he threw that in the ocean..." Sighing dramatically, she swept away with the hat. "I have others. One side of the closet is for hats to annoy Ragnor, the others are the ones I actually like." Yes... a good deal of them had feathers. Just not those kinds of feathers.

"You aren't your ancestor's Alec. You are you. But if it makes you happy, then do it. The crew will feel better and Ragnor will pout that he has nothing left to complain about." Even if her first mate really didn't like complaining... she certainly thought he did. "I'll still keep you safe. I promise."

His question about her father made her pause. She stayed silent and didn't answer it. Answering it could be bad or not, but she wasn't sure. Alec seemed to understand better than most people. That explained why she chose to kiss his hair first. The soft touch of lips on silken strands. Only to gently gasp as he touched her wrist. She fought to keep her eyes closed then felt everything inside melt.

That simple soft press of lips to her own sent a jolt of electricity through her and she made a soft little mewl as he pulled away. Parted lips let little pants escape before she lowered to her knees and gently wrapped her arms about his neck. Taking absolute care not to open her eyes, she rested her head against his.

"You really want to know what happened? With my parents?" She pressed her lips together before taking a deep breath. "My mother killed herself when she saw my eyes... I was just a toddler." Pausing, she bit her lip and shared one detail she'd never shared before. "My eyes were mostly normal up till that day. They just suddenly changed... She hung herself because of me... then my father in anger did everything to kill me. And finally tried to drown me. And... it just all exploded."

Her voice trailed off and she slowly started to let him go. He didn't need a patricidal maniac hugging him. Information like that came with a price. One that made you stay alone. Which was why she rarely if ever told anyone.

Whatever thoughts he might have had about hats and questionable wardrobes and even his ancestors stilled as he gently kissed Magnus. It was something he'd never done before. There had been ladies who had tried to corner him, hoping that a kiss might earn his affections or lead to a situation where his parents might believe he compromised the girl's honor. Alec had managed to avoid them all, his feelings for Jace making it impossible for him to notice a woman in such a way.

At least until Magnus had rescued him, leaving him off balance in ways that he doubted he'd ever mind, looking at him as if he truly did matter.

It still shocked him that he'd been so forward, giving her a sign of affection that he'd never thought to give anyone else. Even when he was close to Jace, he'd never thought to kiss him, afraid of how things might change if he gave into his feelings.

With Magnus, it was simple, at least while he'd been acting it had been. He still wondered over it as he let go of her wrists, his heart fluttering as he caught his breath and a blush darkened his cheeks. He was about to apologize when she knelt beside the tub, arms going around his neck.

As she explained what happened, his heart clenched, the tentative happiness he'd felt scattering as he imagined how scared Magnus must have been when her father had attacked her. Taking her hand, he threaded his fingers between hers. "None of that is your fault, Magnus." There was no hint of doubt in his voice or revulsion. Only concern for her and an attempt to give comfort. "You can't help who your father was anymore than I can stop what my ancestors did to Downworlders. Your stepfather was trying to kill you. You protected yourself. There is nothing to be ashamed of or feel guilty for."

Turning her head, she couldn't help the tiny whisper in his ear. "I've never had a sweeter kiss." Pressing her face into his neck, she hid her face there. He felt warm and solid in her arms, and part of her felt guilty for using him for support when he didn't even know her. Not for lack of trying to tell him...

Breathing in deeply to get calmer, she felt a light headedness sweep through her that dazed her mind as Alec's scent filled her senses. That hadn't been planned on, and she didn't get away fast enough to give him his personal space back. Not that she needed it when his hand found hers.

The moment their fingers intertwined, she pressed closer and clung to him that much more. "I didn't mean to... I didn't know what I was doing." Her voice came softer that time. "I used to wish he'd succeeded. But I'm glad he didn't." Because if she'd been dead, Alec would have died. It sounded so small in a span of centuries, but it felt so true. "If I'd not been there for the Herondales back then... you never would have been born... if I'd not been here, you never would have survived... I am thankful I was there."

Shivering a little at his comforting words, she squeezed his hand gently. "You are... truly something, Alec. Something amazing and special. Never believe anything different."

His blush deepened at those words, embarrassment and pride mixing together as she held him. "It was my first." It probably wasn't something he should admit, but Magnus was telling him about his past and he wanted her to know that the kiss was important... that she was important even if she didn't seem to believe that.

Running the fingers of his free hand along her arm, he turned so he could softly kiss her cheek, still dazed by his own forwardness, but needing to give her comfort. "I know you didn't. But he was hurting you. You protected yourself. It was no different than killing the demons who were trying to kill me." Except she'd been a child and shouldn't have had to experience something that horrified most adults.

Brushing his thumb along her knuckles, he wondered about the Herondales she'd known and what she might have done to help them. "I'm glad too and not just because I'd be dead if you weren't. I want you to be here." With him. "I'll believe that if you try to believe the same about yourself."

It wouldn't be that easy of course, but maybe she'd start to reconsider her own worth. Letting out a quiet sigh, wished he didn't have to force her to move but knew he needed to get out of the tub before she became stuck like a statue beside it or he fell asleep in it. "I should probably get out now."

Her eyes nearly opened at that. She'd taken his first kiss. Well.. maybe not taken. He gave it to her. But the idea of it left her dizzy thinking about it. Breathing in slowly again, she hugged him closer. "Someone as handsome as you? I want to say I'm surprised... but I'm not. Not really... your heart... it's more sincere." Not like other men that would corner her thinking they could have what they wanted. Magnus never gave unless she wanted to and it became rarer the older she got.

Shivering a little at the touch to her arm, she moved the hand not in his up to softly play with his hair. "Do you know how horrifying it is? To understand why mundane's would want to kill a child like I myself? And yet hate them for being so closed minded." She laughed mirthlessly and sighed. "This world has always been messed up."

Humming a soft sound of happiness at the kiss to her cheek, she felt the sleepiness seep into her as she focused on his warmth in her arms. The tub, by contrast was cold and the wood floor hurt her knees. But it didn't matter. She likely would have stayed like that if he'd not mentioned getting up. "Oh? Done?"

She carefully unwound from him feeling like the cat that caught the canary, wondering if he'd wanted a reason to make her let go. "I'll... I'll check with the guards outside to see if they brought clothes like I asked." She nearly stumbled when she backed away. Her skin felt warm on her face and she knew she was slightly flushed. "I'm sorry... I shouldn't have invaded your space. It was very selfish of me..."

"I'm not handsome, Magnus." He knew he wasn't bad looking. The women who had chased after him hadn't looked repulsed like they did when they chased after the Shadowhunters that were twice their age, but that didn't mean he was handsome. Jace was the one that everyone looked at. Alec faded into the background in comparison. Not that he ever really minded since what Magnus guessed was true. There'd never been anyone he wanted to kiss until now. "But you're right. "You're right. I never wanted to kiss anyone before."

Which might seem sad but better to wait than to lead someone on. He knew how painful that could be even when it'd been his own fault.

Tipping his head into the fingers in his hair, he tried to think of what it might have been like but knew he'd never truly understand. "No, I don't, but that doesn't mean I don't want to make it better. Or that I don't believe in the ideals we spoke of before."

Gently squeezing her hand before she moved away, he selfishly wished she could stay near. "I - uh..." It took a moment for him to remember that he hadn't washed his hair. "I can hurry up with the rest." Or he'd try to if he didn't forget since calming her after that apology seemed more important. Wincing as he twisted around in the tub so he could watch her, guilt twisted in his chest as he saw her blush. "There's nothing to be sorry for. I didn't mind. I... uh... liked it."

"Who told you such lies? You're lucky I have self-control and remember at least some propriety and remind myself I'm not allowed to instigate pursuits of affections." Teasing him lightly, it was actually true. She may flirt and make her interest known, but actual pursuit was not something she did on account of men not liking that sort of behavior. "That and you're..." She struggled for the right word before turning her head to nuzzle his hair. "I value you too much to be so forward without your consent. Is that a good way of wording it? I can be amazing with words or really awful."

But the fact he kissed her and gave something so precious to her made her kiss just behind his ear softly. "I promise you... it is a kiss I will treasure in my memories." That she will likely taste and feel every time she closed her eyes.

Gently kneading his scalp, she smiled just slightly at his words and desire to make it better. "That's good enough. It's more than I expect... I know... if you'd been there... you would have saved me." She knew that without a doubt in her mind. And maybe then she would have known what it was like to be held by someone that cared after the sudden 'demon' appeal her parents accused her of...

Standing there a moment longer, she didn't move until he'd told her he liked it. The smallest of smiles pulled at the corner of her lips and she tucked dark hair behind her ears. "Let me check for your clothes... then I'll wash your hair. I promise not to look." Turning away, she finally opened her eyes and hurried to the door. After a quick discussion with the cabin boy, she took the clothes and scurried back in.

Moving back to Alec, she never looked at his bare form and simply set the clothes for when he got out then grabbed the soap for his hair and the tumbler he'd drank out of before. Closing her eyes again, she set them on the floor then slid back to her knees. "Tip your head back for me? No point going under water and getting your ears flooded." She rested her hands on the side of the tub waiting for his okay, eyes still closed. She could help... and still respect his privacy.

"No one told me. My brother and sister are the attractive ones." It was an odd subject to discuss with with anyone. Almost as odd as someone thinking he was handsome and flirting with him, even if Magnus was only teasing. But it wasn't something that really bothered him except he wished sometimes that he was noticed for his own talents instead of comparing him to Izzy and Jace.

Smiling as she nuzzled his hair, Alec reminded himself that his siblings weren't here. No one on the ship knew them. He was Alec not their older brother. "That's a good way of wording it." Flushing slightly when Magnus said how special the kiss was to her, he gently squeezed her hand. "I'll treasure it too."

Leaning into those fingers, he hummed softly, eyes closing as he relaxed against the back of the tub. "I wouldn't have let him hurt you, Magnus." Alec hated killing mundanes, but if one was threatening a child, he would ignore those doubts. Later, he might feel guilty that there hadn't been other options, but he wouldn't have let her stepfather harm her.

He was so relaxed by the attention to his scalp that it took him a moment to realize what she'd said. Part of him wanted to protest but another realized they were being silly, worrying over propriety when she'd spent days alone with him. He needed help even if he disliked admitting it. Forcing her to close her eyes would only make things more difficult for both of them.

Once he knew the door was shut and she returned to the bathtub, Alec tipped his head up to look at her. "You don't have to close your eyes if you don't want to. You've seen a naked man before." At least he assumed she had even if the thought made him uncomfortable. "It'll just be easier if you can see what you're doing."

"Joking aside, my angel... you are very handsome. In fact.. my favorite color combination. Blue eyes and black hair. Added on to the fact you have the perfect personality. Honest. Kind. Good morals. You are a beautiful person." Smiling at that, she slipped her fingers through his hair. And when he told her he'd treasure it as well, she pulled his hand to her lips and kissed the back of it gently.

Another kiss was placed to the top of Alec's head gently. "I know you would have... I don't doubt it at all." Nuzzling into his hair, she let out a soft sigh. Moving away from Alec to get the clothes and close up the cabin. Funnily enough, she hurried back to him. The idea of being far from Alec seemed unacceptable all of a sudden.

What she hadn't expected was Alec saying she didn't have to close her eyes. Her brow furrowed at the thought and she took a deep breath. She almost did as he asked until both brows rose at the comment about her seeing a naked man before. "Highly unfair to say that. Even if it's true, just... Don't put yourself in that place." Setting everything down, she once more wrapped her arms about his shoulders and leaned her head against his.

"It will be easier, Alec... but... I don't want to upset you." Nuzzling into his hair, she let out a sigh. "Okay... I'll try not to look more than necessary." Letting him go, she kept her eyes high and on his hair and face. Gently pulling him back, she fought every impulse to let her eyes wanders. Instead she focused on washing his hair, fingers running through his hair and massaging his scalp.

"I'm not perfect, Magnus." No amount of convincing would make him believe that, but knowing that she believed that of him both thrilled and frightened him. He wanted her to think the best of him, but he was afraid he might someday disappoint her.

At least she knew that he wasn't like the other hunters who would have enjoyed watching a mundane try to kill a warlock. Which made it easier to ignore that he suddenly wanted to call her back when she went to get his clothes. Or why the thought of her leaving bothered him.

Her comment about being put in 'that place' confused him. Even if he'd momentarily thought of her having lovers, it had been mostly her work as a healer that had him making that assumption. The idea of what 'that place' could be and that he would never be in considered in such a way caused his heart to drop in a way that he didn't understand.

He'd been in love with Jace even if his foster brother had quickly ended all thoughts of those feelings being returned. The male form was what had interested him. The ladies he'd been introduced to never once catching his eye until Magnus.

"I didn't mean it like that, Magnus. I apologize. I meant that you must have seen naked men when you were working as a healer." Sighing quietly as she put her arms around him, Alec told himself that it was just kindness. Nothing more. He barely even knew her. There was no reason to feel disappointed. "It won't upset me if you see."

Closing his eyes, he leaned back for her, telling himself that she was acting out of compassion for her patient and possible friendship and to think anything else would be foolish.

"No, there is no true depiction of perfection. Not in the literal sense. But there is a 'perfect' for me." Smiling at that, she tugged at his hair. The more she learned about him the warmer she felt inside just being near him. He was... absolutely perfect for her. In every way she could even possibly imagine.

Which kept her floating until she felt that change in his posture after her words. Replaying them in her head, she tried to figure out what she'd said wrong. Furrowing her brow, she felt her eyes suddenly straying. Her breath caught and she felt her heart start to skip beats. Closing her eyes, she barely realized she moved to softly kiss his neck.

The hint of soap and water made her smile before she leaned back to rinse out his hair. "Alec... you may not mean it that way..." It was a terrible gamble, but all she could think was that she upset him by trying to reassure him. And honestly, it would be obvious if she kept stealing little affectionate gestures. "But I do... You see... I don't want you to put yourself on their level because you're.... you're above that level."

Gently massaging the soap out of the soft hair, she made sure to get all the soap and grime out of his hair. Gently setting the cup down, she dared to rise and pick up his towel. Moving around the tub, he face flushed red as her eyes ran over him before shooting back up to his face. "You shouldn't let me look at you like this... because I want to." Her skin flush darker at that. Her hands literally shook as she unfolded the towel and held it open for him. "So... um... come here?"

Magnus' reassurances that he was perfect for her left him unsure of how he should feel about not being in 'that place.' It sounded like she could possibly have feelings for him someday but if he shouldn't think of himself that way then that such hopes were foolish.

Hopes that despite telling himself were impossible caught in his chest as Magnus pressed her lips to his neck, finding a spot that caused his breath to stutter. Those feelings tumbled around, as he tried to untangle her meaning. Being above the others didn't sound quite as reassuring as she probably intended. Even if that kiss was something he doubted she'd give him if she wasn't interested in him.

His thoughts didn't clear until after she was finished rinsing the soap from his hair and had she gotten the towel. Seeing that blush reassured him, causing his face to warm when he saw that she was attracted to him. Giving her a nervous, shy smile when his gaze caught hers. "I don't mind you looking."

It was improper and something that went against him wanting to protect her reputation but it was the truth and Alec didn't want her to feel guilty for looking at him. He slowly stood, ignoring how he tub and the floor beneath it seemed to tip slightly beneath him and carefully stepped over the edge. Gripping the edge until he knew he had regained his balance, he wondered how bad his wounds had really been.

The heat of the water might have made things worse, but he had the feeling that wasn't the only reason he felt shaky. Moving toward Magnus, he focused on each step instead of the fact that he was naked. When he stood in front of her, he gave her an embarrassed look, almost apologizing for needing her help but realizing that might sound ungrateful. "I'm sorry I haven't healed faster."

As his eyes caught hers, she felt the shiver crawl up her spine. Lips parted as she took a deep breath only to unexpected gasp softly as he said he didn't mind her looking. The idea of being given permission to look at him like this made her chest erupt in butterflies and the blush to even touch her ears. And no matter how much she wanted to let her eyes slip lower, she held his gaze, slit pupils dilated to show more black.

Her eyes didn't wander till he started to get up. Instantly they followed tracks of water droplets over skin that left her longing to touch and follow. She'd known lust. One her age would not make it this far without knowing it. But Alec... Alec left her stunned for words and wanting more than just the carnal pleasure of sex. She wanted more than that.

Thoughts breaking as he faltered, she moved forward. At first, her hands rested on his sides to steady him, but she could feel him through the towel. Feverish thoughts ran through her mind as she lifted her eyes to his. "You are healing fast. I'm horrible for wanting it to take a while... so I can touch you." Lowering her head, she tried to catch her breath as her hands moved. They took entirely too long drying him off. She moved to his hair first then slowly worked down. Part of her even screamed at her behavior, but she didn't stop.

Finally dropping the towel, she carefully checked the larger wounds and let her hands linger on his skin. When she was certain all were getting better and not worse, she pressed a little closer, hands on his hips almost shyly. "You mentioned I've seen a lot of men naked for healing... but honestly... I leave it to Catarina normally. You... you are different. I don't know why, but you drew me in. And the more I talk to you, the more drawn to you I am."

Alec knew that she was watching him and there was more than just concern in her gaze. It was something he wasn't used to, causing him to feel shy but not like he did when those potential fiancees had been watching him. They'd thought of money and connections, wanting him for more than just his look. Magnus looked at him because she thought he was attractive inside and out just like he thought of her.

Which was something he shouldn't think about when he was wet and naked and too tired to refuse her help getting back into bed. Alec was attracted to her no matter how confusing that might be since he liked males... or more correctly, he'd liked Jace. He'd never been interested in anyone else until he'd met Magnus.

His confused thoughts fell away as Magnus moved to help him. He swayed for a moment, either because of the tiredness that seemed to seep into his bones once he was out of the bath or because Magnus was near, and rested his hands on her shoulders until he felt steadier. Closing his eyes, he took a slow breath, trying to ignore the feeling of her hands and the cloth against his skin. At least the exhaustion was a blessing of sort since he was too tired to react to her touching him.

But his breath still caught when he felt her fingers trail over him, a blush heating his face. "I - uh - It's not horrible." Alec couldn't bring himself to say he wanted her to touch him even if he knew it was true. Swallowing hard, he tried not to think of her hands on his hips or how close she was. Or how his earlier preferences didn't seem to matter with Magnus. "You draw me in too. I've never... This hasn't happened to me before."

The feeling of his hands on her shoulders made her smile. His hands felt strong even through they were so very gentle. So much about Alec felt gentle and kind even if he tried to stay 'tough'. It may be a veneer, but the veneer was just as real as the beautiful person hiding inside. Alec could be dangerous. All shadowhunters could be.

All while drying him off, she was conscious of his tired state. Stopping to steady him now and again, she finally had him dry and ready for the bed. This time when her hands rested on his hips, there lie nothing between them. "It's not?" Smiling up at him, she brushed her fingertips over his sides softly. "No... you've become to important to me."

Gently releasing one hand from his hip, she knelt down and picked up the shirt first. "Let's get you dressed, angel." moving closer, she let him lean on her as she held up the shirt so he could slide his arms in first. "As lovely as you are with or without clothing, I know you'll be more comfortable in something rather than nothing." Carefully wrapping her arm about his waist, she waited till he was ready to pull the shirt over his head.

If it had been anyone else helping him, Alec would have pulled away and tried to get dried off an dressed by himself even if he almost fell on his face doing so. He wouldn't have let his family see how tired he was or that his injuries still pained him. But Magnus would be hurt if he refused to let her help.

So he didn't feel guilty when he leaned on her, although he made sure not to rest too much of his weight on her. As her hands settled on his hips, he realized that there wasn't anything separating them, a blush creeping over his face. "No, it's not."

Shivering at the feeling of her fingers against his skin, he looked down at her, struggling to find something to say. She was becoming important to him as well, but his feelings were so confused that he didn't know how to express them so that he didn't sound foolish or hurt her by accident. "You're becoming important to me as well." It didn't truly describe how he felt, but it was a start. Something safe that hopefully wouldn't be taken the wrong way when he wasn't sure of his thoughts.

Smiling as she helped him with the shirt, the blush brightened when her arm curled around his waist. "I don't think lovely describes me. Especially not after that fight." The worst of the wounds were closed, but they were still angry and red. Combined with the scars that covered his body, 'lovely' didn't seem appropriate.

Letting out a sigh, he began pulling the shirt over his head, knowing it would hurt but Magnus was right. He would feel comfortable if he was clothed.

Even if the flush stayed true on her cheeks, she smiled. Hearing him say that she wasn't horrible for wanting to be close to him let her breath easier. Something whispered in her mind one simple truth. She was falling for her nephilim guest. Being told she was important didn't help her stop it either.

It had been a very long time since that happened to her.

Breathing in slowly, she rubbed at his back idly as he complained about being called lovely. "Scars tell stories, Alec. They aren't ugly. They speak of sacrifice and strength. Honor. Valor." She idly touched a scar before meeting his eyes and sending him an adoring smile. "In my eyes... you are lovely. No arguments. I have impeccable vision."

Carefully helping with his shirt, she smoothed it down before letting go for a moment to grab the soft pants. "You're going to have to hold on to me. Whether my head or shoulders." Guiding his hands to her shoulders again, she made sure he was steady first. With that she dipped down and held the pants out for him.

"All right, last thing then we put you to bed. Deal?"

When he saw the blush that brightened her cheeks, Alec couldn't help thinking of how beautiful she was even if that thought was improper considering his lack of clothing. But she was beautiful, the color making her eyes seem brighter and reminding him that she seemed just as nervous about this as he was.

His scars weren't something he hated but they weren't something he was proud of either. They were part of his life, part of who and what he was. Every Nephilim who hunted had them. Magnus made them seem like they were medals instead of just remnants of fights and training. Not that he really deserved to be thought of as a hero since the first time he'd killed a demon was the night Magnus found him. "They don't tell much of a story. I'm not a great hunter. I don't like to kill."

Slowly, he returned that smile, reassured even though he knew the other Shadowhunters thought less of him because of his ideals. "I think you're the only one who sees me."

Which reminded him of how much she could see she pulled down the shirt. For a moment, his hands hovered near her shoulders, eyes wide as he stared at her nervously. It was ridiculous to be shy after she had helped him with his bath, but in ways this seemed more intimate.

Telling himself that there was no reason to be embarrassed, he moved as quickly as he could, stepping into the pants before he lost his equilibrium. As soon as he was sure he wouldn't stumble, he brushed his fingers over her cheek. "Thank you for saving me, Magnus."

Magna reeled at his words. Saying that he didn't like to kill like it was something to be ashamed of... But to her, it had to be the most amazing thing she'd ever heard. Gold eyes brightened and everything seemed to surge forward in one motion. Both hands rose and cupped his face as she lifted up on her toes. Sweetly brushing her lips to his, she smiled as she kissed him.

Without backing too far away, she spoke softly, in a tone that poured out her heart. "Why does a Nephilim's worth lie in how many are killed? Shouldn't it lie in how many lives are saved? The Angel given duty of keeping balance and protecting? Not mindlessly killing." Opening her eyes, she pressed a kiss to the corner of his lips. "Alec... you are the most beautiful angel I've ever met. And I'm sure... I will never meet another like you."

Slipping her fingers away, she sent him a blindingly beautiful smile. "I do see you... and your heart is beautiful." Her skin flushed again, but she didn't back down. Simply lowered off her toes and resumed what she was doing.

Helping him into his pants felt so much easier but more intimate and sweet. It wasn't about sex or the possibility there of... it was about Alec and her so close it meant even more than that sort of intimacy. "You're welcome..." Lifting her head into his touch, she found his eyes as she deftly laced up the back so he'd be fully clothed and more comfortable.

Staying on her knees, she lifted her hand to cover his against her cheek while the other held his hip to keep him steady. "I'm so very glad we met..."

If he hadn't been so surprised by the kiss, Magnus' words would have awed him. They were what he'd always believed in, the ideal Nephilim were supposed to reach for but few bothered with. Later he would think of her words and how important they were, but for now the banished all thoughts of demons and the Clave.

Instead his world was gentle hands on his face and the press of soft lips against his. Bright tingles of warmth ran through him from the kiss, settling in his chest until it felt like he was floating. His heart skipped a beat when he saw the happiness reflected in her golden eyes, dazed by that smile. Trying to remember how to breathe, he looked down at her, giving her a shy, adoring smile. "You're beautiful too, Magnus. I don't... I'm not good with words but I see you as well. I know that you're one of the brightest people I'll ever meet and I wish that I knew how to tell you what I see in you."

It wasn't elegant or witty like Jace or Isabelle would have managed, but it was honest. Maybe Magnus would value that more than eloquence.

As he finished dressing, he tried not to think of how close she was or about how he'd felt when she'd kissed him. Instead, he focused on simple movements, making sure he didn't lose his balance or put too much weight on her shoulders. And the kindness she showed him when so many people would have let him die or let him struggle on his own once he was awake. Still his mind drifted to how intimate this was, like he was the only person who mattered to her and she the only one that mattered to him as well.

Brushing his thumb along the curve of her cheek, he blushed slightly as he smiled. "I'm glad too." Taking the hand she had rested on his hip, he urged her to stand, helping as best he could. "Meeting you was worth the pain it cost to get here."

Since she met Alec, she smiled more than she had in years. Genuine truth and warmth that overflowed inside like a volcano erupting. He sent waves of warmth through him that made her forget all else around her for a blissful moment. Not to mention the lovely taste of Alec's lips after that kiss. It became all too clear to her. She fell and she fell hard for him.

Hearing him say those things made her eyes go out of focus just a moment before she grinned at him lovingly. "Nothing but honesty... it only adds to how amazing I find you. You know that?" Those honest words went further than any pretty flamboyance of language ever could.

Breathing in slowly at the brush of his thumb on her cheek, she carefully rose to her feet. Smiling warmly, she took his hand in hers since he'd pulled her up. "I rather you not be in pain... but you're right, it turned out for the best." The best thing that had ever happened to her possibly. Alec made her dizzy with happiness with the simplest words.

Pulling his arm about her waist, she wrapped her own about his. "Let's get you to bed." Turning them slowly, she guided her young charge back to the bed and helped him lay down. "Mm... yep. I picked the perfect color to bring out your eyes." Smiling at him, she sat on the edge of the bad still holding the one hand. Carefully playing her fingers over his hand, she moved it so they would be intertwined together. It felt almost.... romantic like that.

"They should bring food when the cook is done. You're all right? Should I go dig up something in the meantime?" The hand not in his rose to gently sweep his hair back and out of his eyes. No matter how tired she felt, she would rather run around to get him all that he could possibly need. Tracing the side of his face, she smiled lovingly.

His words might lack eloquence, but when he saw Magnus' expression, he knew that they had been enough. That brightness that caused his breath to catch seemed to light up the entire room. And that look, that smile, was for him. The thought seemed to banish the shadows that lingered in his heart, driving away the hurt and doubt that accompanied his infatuation with his parabtai. Whenever he'd thought of Jace, he'd felt like less, knowing his feelings would never be returned, but Magnus made him feel like more.

If he wasn't so caught up in her happiness and his own, he might have been shocked by the idea that he was falling for her but instead he only wanted to stay near her and make her smile again. Laughing softly, he squeezed her hand as Magnus stood. "I'd prefer not being in pain too. I don't enjoy getting hurt." Not like Jace seemed to. His parabatai seemed to enjoy getting beaten up on a regular basis.

With his arm around Magnus, whatever embarrassment he might have felt over needing help to move to the bed was completely forgotten. He felt lighter when she was near, his feet seeming to barely touch the floor despite how carefully they moved. Alec couldn't remember when he'd been so happy simply from being close to someone. Even during the worst of his crush on Jace, he'd never felt such happiness.

Before he climbed into bed, he pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head in silent thanks for her help. Once he was settled, he finally noticed the color of the bedding and what she said about her choice. "You picked the sheets to match my eyes?" Thought caused his blush to return. Izzy talked about coordinating colors when trying to get him out of his 'drab' wardrobe but he'd never heard of color discussed in such a way for bedding.

He wanted to ask why but the answer might force him to think of all those rules of propriety that they were ignoring. Then Alec might be forced to pull his hand away when he wanted Magnus to stay at his side for as long as she could before her duties forced her to leave. "I'm all right. I can wait to eat." And even if he was starving, he doubted he'd tell her since that would mean she'd leave him.

Smiling as she brushed his hair away from his face, he began to notice how tired she looked, thinking of how much energy it must have cost her to heal him. Magnus wouldn't allow him to rest on the couch and it was unfair that she would be uncomfortable while watching over him. "You can lie down with me if you want." It was improper, but after helping him bathe and letting her see him naked, it seemed foolish to follow those rules.

"Any sane person wouldn't enjoy pain. And considering I don't feel myself all the way on the sane side of the line, it's not even something I think insane people always like." Winking at him playfully, she knew it was a stretch. Some of the mentally disturbed liked pain. But not the majority. Of that she was pretty certain.

"Silly topics aside..." She winked at him playfully while settling him in. Her smile stayed warm and please as she felt him kiss into her hair. "You really do need to rest." Her grin broadened at the mention of the sheets before she tipped her head. "Not just your eyes... it looks amazing with your hair and skin tone." Which instantly drew up memories of his naked form splayed over the silk sheets and causing her face to heat up instantly. Breathing in through parted lips, gold darkened just a little. "It's a lovely sight..."

Settling on the edge of the bed, she leaned close, dark raven's wing hair sliding forward as she kissed his forehead. It brushed his cheek even as she lifted away. "All right. If you're sure... I don't want you to get hungry..."

What she'd not really thought he'd ask was to join him. Her mind flicked back to the pretty image of him in the sheets bare and quickly got shoved back into her mind so she could think clearly. Not out... no... she had a feeling she'd treasure every memory of him. Even if they were more like fantasies. Moving slowly, she took her belt off and dropped it on the floor. Shifting to slip into hollow of his form on the bed, she caught his hand and softly traced her fingertips over it. "You're okay with this? Me being this close?"

The comment about insanity had him momentarily wondering about Jace and his need to pick fights with demons that were 'mostly extinct.' It would explain so much about his parabatai's behavior and his confusion when Alec didn't think it was fun to almost be eaten by things that shouldn't exist. "I think it depends on the type of insanity."

Not that that it said much about his sanity since he followed Jace into those crazy situation and ended up getting beat up regularly. His mental state might be in question, but he knew that Magnus was sane, even if some people might think risking her life for someone she'd never met was a sign that she should be in an asylum. "I don't think you're crazy, Magnus, but you do crazy things. Like rescuing me."

As he relaxed into the mattress, he closed his eyes for a moment, surprised that he didn't instantly fall asleep. "I know I do. Moving around was more tiring than I expected." At least physically tiring. Being near Magnus seemed to energize his thoughts, making him hate the idea of sleeping since that would mean she'd leave him even if he knew that she had to.

Blinking up at her, he ignored his exhaustion, blushing brighter at how Magnus wanted to match his coloration with the bedding, thinking of her comment about wanting to touch him. Alec was inexperienced but he knew enough from Jace's stories to have an idea of some of the things she might be thinking of. Things that he'd never thought he'd consider but couldn't help thinking of when he saw her eyes go dark before she kissed his forehead.

Carefully scooting over to give her more room he squeezed her hand when she curled up beside him. Wrapping his arm around her, he sighed softly, the aches that had been bothering him seeming to fade away with Magnus near. For a moment, he considered her question, trying to understand why she'd think he wouldn't want her near. His protests about her reputation had been to protect her, not because he didn't want her close. "I'm okay with it, Magnus. Why wouldn't I be?"

Looking at him thoughtfully, she tipped her head and gently gathered his hand. Pulling it up, she kissed his palm sweetly. "Sometimes people want physical pain to drown out the pain inside. I have seen that." She saw it in Will. The poor boy tortured himself nonstop. Hopefully that wouldn't be the case with Alec even if he was part of Will's family.

Shifting, she slowly lowered herself onto the bed. "Thank you for your vote of confidence in my sanity." Laughing softly, she scooted back into his body and closed her eyes as Alec wrapped his arm about her waist. Continuing to gently trace his fingers and his hand, she felt the purr rising in her chest. Part of her said don't... but she still began to purr quietly.

Pulling his hand to her chest, she knew it likely wasn't the best idea. Trying not to upset him, she went higher than planned to keep him from dying from blushing. Pressing his palm against soft bare skin over the rise of her breasts, she breathed in to sigh softly. "I wanted to be sure... I'm happy you want me close.." More than she could even begin to explain. Her heart skipped a few beats as she covered his hand with her own.

"Mm... if they come looking for me... and I'm asleep... it'd better be an emergency or I'm turning them all into newts. You can tell them that too." Not only because she was tired... but because he made her feel warm and safe in his arms. Part of her whispered 'bad idea' but most of her told that part to 'stuff it'.